No matter how many days I spend here at Purdue University, the same thing never ceases to amaze me: the amount of couples here.
I was here for only a week, and most girls living in my residence hall had boyfriends. I can’t say much, but that’s because I’ve been dating the same guy for over five years whom I met in eighth grade, but that’s beside the point.
As we were walking to class, I was talking to my friend, about how many couples I see here. We began wondering if most people begin dating if they meet at college, or if they come to college together already dating from high school. Then, my friend began discussing her long distance relationship with me.
She and her boyfriend have been together for over four years. They both lived in the same town, which was so small that everyone in their high school knew each other because they all lived on the same two streets. They saw each other everyday, and graduating high school was a real big step for them. No longer would they be together 24/7; he accepted a scholarship from Toledo University, in Ohio, to play baseball, and she chose to go here. They are having a hard time with the long-distance thing. In fact, my friend says it’s one of the hardest things she’s ever had to go through.
My friend has the most trouble when she sees other couples at Purdue who are spending all their time together. I can understand where she’s coming from, like I said, I’ve been dating Jason for over five years. Unlike my friend’s boyfriend, Jason goes to Purdue, but he’s on the flight team, and just got home from Tennessee after being there for over a week. It was so hard for me to be here without him, especially since I ended up in the hospital the day he left. Seeing couples all over campus just made me miss him so much more. I mean, I see him everyday, and going a week without him almost felt impossible to do. I have no idea how my friend does it; she’s basically amazing (haha).
Lately, her boyfriend has been a real pain the ass. He hasn’t been calling her, he won’t come visit, he barely has anything to talk about when they actually do talk, and he just doesn’t try anymore, but then when she talks to him about a potential break-up, he tries to avoid the discussion. Sooo, why won’t he try if he doesn’t want to break up? He won’t end up being with her for the rest of his life like he wants and hopes to be if he doesn’t put forth the effort. It takes two people to make a relationship work, not two, and right now, my friend is the only one contributing to the relationship at all.
In all honesty, I think they’ll make it because they want it so bad. After Jason left for a week, I began thinking about how it would be if he were never around, and it’s just been something I’ve been thinking about lately, especially after hearing the stories about my friend and her boyfriend. Jason and I were about to go to different colleges. I was going to come here, and he was strongly considering going to Florida and attending Embry-Riddle, one of the top flight schools in the country. The only think that kept him here was being close to his family. He has a problem with homesickness (which is weird because I go home like every other weekend, and he’s gone home once). In all, I’ve just realized how thankful I am that Jason is around, and since I’ve been pondering it so much, I figured I might as well blog about it and get it down in writing rather than tossing it around in my brain every five seconds.
If you’re going through a long distance relationship like my friend is going through, my advice is to just decide how much the relationship is worth and weigh your options—do what’s right for you, and make that decision on your own. Don't base your choices on what other's think is right for you. Only you know.
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2 comments:
As freshman year approached, my boyfriend and I weren't getting along at all. It seemed as though we knew what was going to happen when school started and we pushed each other away in advance. He was planning on going to Pennsylvania and I was to stay here and attend Purdue. We ended breaking up, which was what was going to happen even if we hadn't broken up before school started. He ended up taking a job instead and works over 40 hrs a week now. We are both following completely different paths and it would have been so hard to make our relationship work. it would have been possible if we both had wanted it, but obviously that was not the case. Continue following your heart!! =]
My best friend started dating a guy the summer before her senior year in high school and his freshman year in college. He went to Purdue, which is a little over an hour's drive home. He came home every single weekend just to see her. He called her everyday. This year, she chose to stay at home and go to a local college. He just decided to transfer out of Purdue to go to the same college. He never made much attempt to fit in at Purdue because he spent so much time going home. He has friends, but not tons of close friends. I guess I kind of feel bad for him, even though he's in a great relationship. He spent so much effort on that relationship, he kind of missed out on the college experience. His world s pretty much just her. They're a good couple, but they've put so much into their relationship, they kind of lost everything else. So while I still fully agree with the follow your heart and do what makes you happy, don't forget there's more to life than a relationship.
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