Everyone’s favorite subject (part 2)

Last time I gave some advice on dumping someone, but that’s only half of the story. Being dumped is crap, and it’s one of the worst things to happen to a person.

While it is traumatic, there are ways to deal with the pain without the use of substances (other than chocolate).

Go for a walk, job, or bike ride every day. Don’t go in the day, but when the sun is bright and shining. Your body needs sunlight to produce vitamin D, and it’s thought that sunlight helps prevent depression. Vitamin D may also be a great preventative of depression.

Play video games. There’s something satisfying about beating something up. And no, videogames do not cause violence.

Eat chocolate. It makes everything better. (picture from http://www.phillipschocolate.com/gourmet-chocolate.asp)

Beat up a pillow, a stuffed animal, or some other inanimate object. If you take the pillow route, it will be soft and fluffy when you go to bed.

Take some of KJ’s advice on stress. Take a break from things. Breathe.

Get angry. Start a war with the opposite gender. It may sound difficult, but it’s actually easy and rather fun. I started a lynch mob (jokingly), where we’d just talk about taking out our anger. Date multiple people at the same time, and let them know. Schedule all of them to take you out on a date on the same night, but not at the same time. This means that you have legitimate excuses to get out of a date. Hey, you never said you were exclusive with these people. Get them to make you feel like a princess and battle over you.

Talk to people, and get help if you need it. It is much better to be single and miserable than in a relationship and a failure. (The quote from Grey’s went something like that.) Keep your friends and family close. They are wonderful in these situations. My mom sent me 7 boxes of brownie mix (which is completely awesome!)

Remember, people don’t make you who you are. You don’t need some guy or some girl to make you good, smart, or anything else. If they aren’t your best friend and if they don’t make you feel like a better person, then you’re better off without them.

Everyone’s favorite subject

Hello, again. Today, I’m writing about everyone’s favorite subject: relationships. There’s all that gooey PDA going on out there. : )

But that’s not the subtopic that I’ll be addressing today. Today, I’ll be talking about everyone’s least favorite subject: break ups.

There are a few simple rules to ending a relationship:

-when you break up over the phone, it means you’re a pansie or unable to talk to the person (as in, they’re on the other side of the planet, etc.)

-when you break up with a person, you don’t get to make them feel better. You just forfieted that right. If someone stabs your hand, are you going to let them gause it up for you? NO! You are going to run like hell from said person and you’re not going to want to see that person for a long time, and even then, you don’t want to see them if they have any cutlery.

-when you break up, give the other person at least a month to stop hating you before you try and contact them. Every time you text, e-mail, etc. the person, you’re pouring vingegar onto an open wound. If you don’t think it’s hurts, I’d be glad to demonstrate on you to prove my point. If they ever want to talk to you, they will contact you.

-at least have a good reason for dumping the person. “I found someone hotter than you” does not count.

-talk to the person before ending it. Tell them what bugs you. Hold a conversation. I know it’s hard to speak words. Get over it.

And most importantly, don’t be a jerk about it, especially if your new ex is female. There’s this saying: Girls don’t get even. They don’t get revenge. You will never see the truck that hit you.

Girls get all their friends to hate you, form lych mobs, plot your demise, and ultimately have a 12 or less step plan to ruin your life and chances of ever getting another girl ever again. You are placing your future in the hands of a distraught female. If you’re a jerk, you’re more likely to suffer the fate of that plan.